They say it takes a village to raise a child, but I would argue that it takes a village to be a human these days. What we don't talk about is the grief that comes when the village is not who you thought (or society tells us) it should be. As the holidays are fast approaching my Husband and I have been reflecting on the various levels of estrangement we have with both of our families. Some is intentional full on no contact, some connections just got caught up in life, and some have major boundaries to protect our peace. I have been no contact with one of my parents for close to twenty years. It was the healthiest choice my young teen self had ever made (and probably the first time I truly honored ME) and it's not a choice that makes me sad anymore. There are other members of our families that losing/going lower contact with that has been much harder because the circumstances are less clear. I know it brings me more peace, but I miss them. In all of our reflection though...
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